I've been in this house, seven months now. I love it. I am used to being able to walk around a lot more easily and do more things for myself. It's so much b8igger than my original home But I would be silly enough on Friday to slip on a wet floor. That's what anyone can do.
So at the moment, I've got a top bigger top lip than I would normally have. I love it, but I wouldn't go down the operation route for it, I don't like injections or anything because it can go wrong that way unless it's done professionally.
Anyway, I have been quiet because of things going on around me, and I've been very worried about things going on as well. And life has taken over. Unfortunately, which is not what I wanted to do.
But I think in times of healing. Everything else has to go out the window, and it doesn't matter what you think is going on in your head or personally need to be able to do it quickly, or for as short long a period as you need. So if I do go quiet, it was because I'm going through a state of not being brilliant, and I'm just wanting to get on with getting things organised on one going life-ise and making myself feel a bit better.
So I've realised, I'm just gonna keep using that, even if I don't wear makeup every day, I might just wear the primer to start with, because although I love makeup. I haven't worn it for a long time. I’ve not felt as if I've been well enough, mentally to do it, because of the way. I have been stressed out panicked about other little things that are not worth worrying about.
But they still make me worry about them, but also things in the family have been going on so I've been concentrating on those two. I know that I should probably be writing the video and everything else, a lot more emotion than I have been. I will try, but life gets in the way as I had said to you before.
I wanted to do it this way so that I didn't have to make it such a stressful, feeling for myself this Sunday, via the phone. And yes, to everyone else in the house, I'll probably look like a complete idiot talking to myself over the phone. But actually, this is a speedier way of me writing everything down. Doing anything else, because I can edit what I said. For the posts that I do for my blog. And I can keep it real on the audio and video because that's who I am not some kind of portrayed as someone else.
After all, this is the other thing I've been thinking about recently, and it's being true to yourself and wondering what is true to you and what do others perceive of you, or expect of you, because for a very long time and I mean a very long time. I have been. Although, trying to be me. I've always been what everyone else expected doesn't need to be. So, it's nothing, not been easy and I'm beginning to go through that process of thinking, Okay, it's time for me to be me and find the level of exception, except citations that I want, or anyone else wants because no one else matters in that respect because
it's my life, and, and, yeah, it's not what everyone else expects me to do.
But it's what I've wanted to do. I've noticed certain things that I've thought in their dreams that I've thought about a long long long time ago. They're slowly coming to fruition, you know, there have been things that have been stopping the flourishing of the plans because of other people's meddling or life generally getting in a way, because people think they know you better than yourself, which, which isn't the truth. After all, I know you, you know yourself.
If you can't get any feelings for yourself to accept and be who you should be, then you're you'll always be the one, what everyone else expects you to be what they think. Being honest to yourself and truthful to yourself is the most important thing because I'm slowly beginning to learn that people who I, thought was very, what I thought were important, are not very important at all.
After all, they don't understand my situation properly. I have been worried about that. But I'm gonna live my own life when I wanted to because it's important for me to do it the way I wanted. Not what everyone else expects.
I have been pretty lucky is what I've got and done and because a path from cerebral palsy is not expected to have a family, not expected to get married or have children. They are expected to be cared for by their parents or expected as I say to be put in a home, or something else. In my case that isn't because I am married, I'm happily married and have a family, and I'm very lucky and there are lots of us who have got so cosy who do have this chart, and have this in my blog, I have talked about ages. And what disability does throughout the ages! Challenges ahead part one and Challenges ahead part 2
But this is just a general to chat about today. Because of the way things have been this last week or two what I'm suspecting is the beginning of the hormone situation where things are changing because but we'll wait and see what's going on with that as well because it can take ages to find out what's going on.
You know what, though it doesn't matter. I'm happy, I'm safe, I know where I am, I know who I'm with. I also know that it's going to be okay in the future. Although it might seem to be boring or stressful waiting for the future or day by day, I know it's going to be okay. I know that it's going to be fine at times but the disability of realising has problems in some respect. Anyway, so it shouldn't be a problem.
Because you wonder, people who have lots of money are happy or the because they haven't got everything else that they want people who have minimal money are very happy because they got all the people that they want, but may want some actual stuff but that they not necessarily can afford right now, it doesn't mean they can't have it, it can be a gold small goal to have in the future, or whatever. I'm gonna leave this one because it's I'm rambling again, I'm not making too many points in this post.
So I need to split them up, I think, talking about each topic at a time.